Introducing Gus: Isle of Misfit Posters resident Legal Lush

Gus: Isle of Misfit Posters resident Legal Lush

Gus is a manager at the local Ching-Chingers, a hot spot for spoiled teenage kids with mommy's credit card and a pension for nudity. Working at Ching-Chingers wasn't Gus's lifetime goal, but he failed to pass his bar exam and was barred from retaking it after paying a guy to forge his test results, and then posting about it on his tweek-her page.

Now he spends his time trolling the Isle of Misfit Posters, giving out questionable legal advice at best, and stuff that could get you incarcerated, at worst. Gus's constant cologne of booze and cig smoke make him a real chick magnet, which is why he spends his time posting instead of working or actually having a life.

I forgot the safeword.....

Overheard on vent earlier.....

Caged Man: Hello.... can anyone hear me? Puulease help. I forgot the safeword and they won't let me out of here... someone help me.

(CLICK)

(Static)

So, who's moderating this stuff?

Poster with Isle of Misfit Posters.....

Peace: So who's in charge of moderating this place? How am I supposed to manipulate the rules and bend things to my advantage if I have no idea who's running the place, to extort or coerce them in some way?

Forken: The Isle of Misfit Posters currently has only automated scripts and programs handling the technical backend of the system. The posters here currently moderate themselves, choosing to handle things like adults rather than messaging friends in the other channels to come rescue them when they've gotten in over their head.

Peace: But that's how it works isn't it? You start some shit and then bring your friends in to kick sand in the face of the people your fighting with?

Forken: I doubt you'll see much progress with that sort of behavior here. But you're welcome to exercise your freedom to act like that, surely.

Skeksis: NO ONE IS READING THIS PLACE! You're all just whining and moaning for no reason. Why don't you stop dumping in everyone's living rooms and just STFU! No one's even over here except the assholes who want to play the victim card. Stupid victim card playing, anonymous moderation havin', no Keystone loving bastards! DIE IN A BUS FIRE!

There's not even enough BUTTONS! How the hell are people supposed to troll other people with no buttons. Open dialog is for losers!

This just in,Curb Feelers seen on IOMP.....

Posted on the Isle of Misfit Posters.....

LaTigra: Hey. I thought I'd come check this place out since there's such a commotion about it, and the bullshit is getting thick where I come from. I couldn't tell who's running the place, but I don't figure that's important. Looking forward to hanging out.

Forken: Welcome LaTigra. Glad to have you over here. I'm not sure where you're from but here we tend to self moderate and the trolls usually tire and wander off when their tactics fall well below the fail mark.

Peace: Uh, I guess this is where all the 'cool kids' are hanging out? I wonder how long this little revengefest will last? I'm sure once all of you crazy cooks stop patting each other on the back for wrecking our board with your onslaught of facts and your exposure of our lame griefer tactics you'll start kicking each other in the balls and you'll come crying back to Curb Feelers.

Forken: Well Peace you're welcome to hang out here all you want. I doubt many people here will be frequenting Curb Feelers much anymore since the hacker is in charge and everyone is complacent. But hey, whatever rubs your naughty bits right?

Major Humvee: What in the Sam hell are you talking about Peace? No one cares about a gaggle of giggle monkeys rubbin' each others peckers. People go where the conversation is, not where the cover charge is sucking off the owner.

Even I can only stand so much constant assbuggery. With Larry drinking a Keystone truck a week, it's looking like a napalm storm over there.

Now the retarded child of David Koresh and Captain Fruitcake are running shit over there while Larry goes to detox, because let's face it, no one's letting that guy drive.

Sometimes you just want to hang out and talk to your friends while you sharpen your knives, or clean your pistol. You know what I'm sayin.

Earthboi has a plan.....

Posted on Curb Feelers.....

Earthboi Onus: So glad Lester is running things for now. With Dr. Scott missing in action, and things being so tense lately, I think we need some new rules to help lock things down. So I suggest we start cornholing everyone after their first post, and make them explain why we should let them out? If they don't like it, ban them, who needs their shit anyway?

Duhsure: That's an intriguing concept. We can eliminate tormenting them for weeks on end, having them meltdown and then banning them, and just cut right to it. However, then we won't have any noobs to haze. We'll have to start hazing each other.

Perish: You know the Nazi's had pieces of flair they made the Jews wear.

LilyAnne: Did you guys not read that part where they were calling us retarded? I didn't read it either. Such bastards.

Vanilla: I know. I mean, the nerve. I'm so much smarter than all of those people. I can't be troubled to even concern myself with it. My friend's, cousin's, sister's brother's acquaintance used to hottub with Lars Ulrich so we're gonna go to a classy coke party tonight.

Insane Slut: I can remember back to the days when I used to hottub. Things have changed alot since the 20's though, you can't have more than 3 or 4 boyfriends without being called a slut. Ahh you kids have it easy.

BMB: What the fuck is wrong with ya'll? Man this shit is whack.

Sheriff Antman: I don't think anybody wants to hear from you 'Big Money' B. If you have so much money, buy a shirt and get some pant that fit.

Don't you have an Usher concert to get to? By the way, I know it was you that sent those nude cowboy pictures to my email.

Can I get the link to that site? PM me, thanks.

LilyAnne wants attention.....

Posted on Curb Feelers.....

LilyAnne: But someone made drawrings of us! Doesn't anyone care?!? They weren't even good drawrings. They sucked even though the description and title indicate clearly that the badly drawn appearance helps emphasize the ridiculousness and the white trashiness of our behavior!

Who the hell do they think they are? Making fun of stuff that's stupid and shameful is wrong! Pointing out pee-poles flaws and drawring attention to the fact that they can't bring themselves to play nice with other grown-ups is just fucked up!

Let people alone to rant and rage and stomp all over people. That's the 'Merican way. We have the right to abuse people and lie every second of our lives... it's what we do. It doesn't involve reading your lame ass drawrings, including the one where you told me what a fat cow I was, clearly I didn't read that one either.

Hide behind your anonymity you stupid fuckers. All of us are over here keeping it real!